A RECEIPT TO CURE THE VAPOURS.
WHY Will DELIA thus retire,
And languish life away?
While the sighing crowd admire,
'Tis too soon for hartshorn tea!
All those dismal looks and fretting
Cannot DAMON'S life restore!
Long ago, the worms have eat him;
You can never see him more!
Once again consult your toilet !
In the Glass, your face review!
So much weeping soon will spoil it;
And no Spring your charms renew!
I, like you, was born a woman!
Well I know what Vapours mean!
The disease, alas! is common!
Single, we have all the Spleen!
All the Morals that they tell us,
Never cured the sorrow yet!
Choose, among the Pretty Fellows,
One of humour, youth, and wit!
Prithee, hear him, every morning,
At the least an hour or two!
Once again at night returning;
I believe the dose will do!
CEASE, fond Shepherd! Cease desiring
What you never must enjoy!
She derides your vain aspiring!
She, to all your Sex is coy!
Cunning DAMON once pursued her;
Yet She never would incline!
STREPHON too, as vainly wooed her,
Though his flocks are more than thine!
At DIANA'S shrine, aloud,
By the zone around her waist,
Thrice She bowed, and thrice She vowed, Like the Goddess, to be chaste.
THE ANSWER.
THOUGH I never got possession;
'Tis a pleasure to adore!
Hope, the wretch's only blessing,
May, in time, procure me more!
Constant courtship may obtain her,
Where both wealth and merit fail;
And the lucky minute gain her!
Fate and fancy must prevail!
At DIANA'S shrine, aloud,
By the bow and by the quiver, Thrice She bowed, and thrice She vowed, Once to love-and that for ever!
WHO ADVISED LADY M. W. MONTAGU TO RETIRE.
You little know the heart, that you advise!
I view this various scene with equal eyes!
In crowded Court, I find myself alone;
And pay my worship to a nobler throne!
Long since, the value of this World I knew!
Pitied the folly; and despised the shew!
Well as I can, my tedious part I bear;
And wait dismissal, without pain, or fear!
Seldom I mark Mankind's detested ways;
Not hearing censure, or affecting praise!
And, unconcerned, my future fate I trust
To that sole Being, merciful and just!
IN good King CHARLES's golden days,
When loyalty no harm meant;
A furious High Churchman I was,
And so I gained preferment.
Unto my flock I daily preached,
'Kings are by GOD appointed;
And damned are those, who dare resist,
Or touch, the Lord's Anointed!'
And this is law, I will maintain
Unto my dying day, Sir!
That whatsoever King shall reign,
I will be Vicar of Bray, Sir!
When royal JAMES possessed the crown, And Popery grew in fashion!
The Penal Law I hooted down;
And read the Declaration!
The Church of Rome, I found would fit
Full well my constitution;
And I had been a Jesuit
But for the Revolution.
And this is law, I will maintain, &c.
When WILLIAM, our Deliverer, came
To heal the nation's grievance ;
I turned the cat in pan again,
And swore to him allegiance.
Old principles I did revoke;
Set conscience at a distance!
Passive Obedience is a joke!
A jest is Non Resistance!
And this is law, I will maintain, &c.
When glorious ANNE became our Queen,
The Church of England's glory!
Another face of things was seen;
And I became a Tory!
Occasional Conformists base,
I damned; and Moderation!
And thought the Church in danger was,
From such prevarication.
And this is law, I will maintain, &c.
When GEORGE, in pudding time, came o'er;
And Moderate Men looked big, Sir!
My principles I changed once more;
And so became a Whig, Sir!
And thus preferment I procured
From our Faith's great Defender;
And, almost every day, abjured
The Pope, and the Pretender.
And this is law, I will maintain, &c.
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