Mar. (R. c.) You are all wisdom.

SirG. I would be worldly wise; for the other wis dom,

That does prescribe us a well-goven'd life,

And to do right to others as ourselves,

I value not an atom.

Mar. What course take you,

To hedge in the manor

Of your neighbour, Mr. Frugal? As 'tis said,
He will nor sell, nor borrow, nor exchange;

And his land, lying in the midst of your many lordships,

Is a foul blemish.

Sir G. I have thought of't, Marrall;

And it shall take.

[Placing his hand on MARRALL'S shoulder.] I must have all men, sellers,

And I the only purchaser.

Mar. "Tis most fit, sir.

Sir G. I'll therefore buy some cottage near his manor; Which done, I'll make my men break ope' his fences, Ride o'er his standing corn, and in the night

Set fire to his barns, or break his cattle's legs;
These trespasses draw on suits, and suits expences,
Which I can spare, but will soon beggar him.
When I have harried him thus two or three year,
Though he sue in forma pauperis, in spite
Of all his thrift and care, he'll grow behind-hand.
Mar. The best I ever heard! I could adore you.
Sir G. Then, with the favour of my man of law,
I will pretend some title: want will force him
To put it to arbitrement; then, if he sell
For half the value, he shall have ready money,
And I possess his land.

Mar. Wellborn was apt to sell, and needed not
These fine arts, sir, to hook him in.

Sir G. Well thought on,

That varlet, Wellborn, lives too long, to upbraid me With my close cheat put upon him. Will nor cold Nor hunger kill him?

Mar. I know not what to think on't.

I've us'd all means; and, the last night, I caus'd
His host the tapster turn him out of doors;

And have been since with all your friends and tenants,
And, on the forfeit of your favour, charg'd them,
Though a crust of mouldy bread would keep him from
starving,

Yet they should not relieve him. This is done, sir

Sir G. That was something, Marrall; but thou must

go further,

And suddenly, Marrall.

Mar. Where and when you please, sir.

Sir G. I'd have thee seek him out, and, if thou canst, Persuade him that 'tis better steal than beg:

Then, if I prove he has but robb'd a hen-roost,
Not all the world shall save him from the gallows
Do any thing to work him to despair,

And 'tis thy master-piece.

Mar. I'll do my best, sir.

Sir G. I'm now on my main work, with the Lord. Lovell,

The gallant-minded, popular, Lord Lovell,

The minion of the people's love. I hear

He's come into the country; and my aims are,

To insinuate myself into his knowledge,

And then invite him to my house.

Mar. I have you;

This points at my young mistress.
Sir G. She must part with

That humble title, and be honourable,

Right honourable, Marrall, my right honourable daughter;

If all I have, or e'er shall get, will do it!
I'll have her well-attended; there are ladies

Of errant knights decay'd, and brought so low,

That, for cast clothes and meat, will gladly serve her And 'tis my glory, tho' I come from the city,

To have their issue, whom I have undone,

To kneel to mine, as bond-slaves.

Mar. 'Tis fit state, sir.

Sir G. And therefore, I'll not have a chamber-maid That ties her shoes, or any meaner office,

But such whose fathers were right worshipful.

'Tis a rich man's pride! there having ever been More than a feud, a strange antipathy,

Between us and true gentry.

Enter WELLBORN, R.

Mar. (c.) See, who's here, sir.

[Crosses to L.C

Sir G. (L.) Hence, monster! prodigy!
Well. (R.) Call me what you will;-

I am your nephew, sir, your sister's son.

Sir G. Avoid my sight! thy breath's infectious, rogue!

I shun thee as a leprosy, or the plague,

Come hither, Marrall.-This is the time to work him. Mar. (L.) I warrant you, sir. [Exit SIR GILES, L. Well. (R. C.) By this light, I think, he's mad.

Mar. (c.) Mad! had you ta'en compassion on yourself,

You long since had been mad.

Well. You've ta'en a course,

Between you and my venerable uncle,

To make me so.

Mar. (R. C.) The more pale-spirited you, That would not be instructed. I swear deeplyWell. (L. c.) By what?

Mar. By my religion.

Well. Thy religion?

The devil's creed!-But what would you have done?
Mar. Had there been but one tree in the whole shire,
Or any hope to compass a single halter,

Before, like you, I had outliv'd my fortunes,
A withe had serv'd my turn to hang myself.
I'm zealous in your cause: 'pray, hang yourself,
And presently, as you love your credit.

Well. I thank you.

Mar. Will you stay till you die in a ditch?
Or, if you dare not do the feat yourself,

But that you'll put the state to charge and trouble,
Is there no purse to be cut? house to be broken?
Or market-woman with eggs that you may murder,
And so dispatch the business?

Well. Here's variety,

I must confess; but I'll accept of none

Of all your gentle offers, I assure you.

Mar. If you like not hanging, drown yourself; take

some course

For your reputation.

Well. "Twill not do, dear tempter,

With all the rhetorick the fiend hath taught you,

I am as far as thou art from despair;

Nay, I have confidence, which is more than hope,

To live and suddenly, better than ever. [Crosses to L c. Mar. Ha! ha! these castles, you build in the air,

Will not persuade me or to give or lend

A token to you.

Well. I'll be more kind to thee:

Come, thou shalt dine with me.

Mar. With you!

Well, Nay more, dine gratis.

C

Mar. (c.) Under what hedge, I pray you? or at

whose cost?

Are they padders, or gipsies, that are your consorts ?
Well. Thou art incredulous; but thou shalt dine,
Not alone at her house, but with a gallant lady;
With me, and with a lady.

Mar. Lady! what lady'

With the lady of the lake, or queen of fairies?
For, I know, it must be an enchanted dinner.
Well. With the Lady Allworth, knave.
Mar. Nay, now there's hope

Thy brain is crack'd.

Well. Mark there with what respect

I am entertained.

Mar. With choice, no doubt, of dog-whips. Why, dost thou ever hope to pass her porter?

Well. "Tis not far off, go with me; trust thine own

eyes.

Mar. Troth, in my hope, or my assurance rather, To see thee curvet and mount like a dog in a blanket, If ever thou presume to pass her threshold,

I will endure thy company.

Well. Come along then. [Crosses, and exeunt, R. SCENE II.-The Hall in Lady Allworth's House. Enter WATCHALL, FURNACE, ORDER, AMBLE, and ALLWORth, R.

Allw. (L.) Your courtesies o'erwhelm me: I much grieve

To part with such true friends; and yet find comfort.
My attendance on my honourable lord,
Whose resolution holds to visit my lady,

Will speedily bring me back.

[WELLBORN and MARRALL without, L. WELLBORN knocks-Exit WATCHALL, L.

Mar. Dar'st thou venture further?

Amb. (R. c.) Perform it bravely.

[Knocks.

Fur. (L. C.) I know my cue, ne'er doubt me. [Exeunt FURNACE, L. S. E. ORDER and AMBLE, R. Enter WATCHALL, WELLBORN, and MARRALL, L.

Wat. Beast that I was, to make you stay! Most wel

come;

You were long since expected.

Well. (L. C.) Say so much

To my friend,

pray you.

Wat. (R. C.) For your sake, I do, sir.
Mar. (L.) For his sake!

Well. (c.) Mum; this is nothing.

Mar. More than ever

I'd have believ'd, tho' I had found it in my primer. Allw. (R.) When I have given you reasons for my late harshness,

You'll pardon and excuse me; for, believe me, Though now I part abruptly, [Crosses to c.] in my service

I will deserve it.

Mar. Service! with a vengeance!
Well. I'm satisfied: farewell, Tom.

Allw. All joy stay with you!

[Crosses, and Exit, L.

Enter AMBLE, R.

Amb. You're happily encounter'd; I ne'er yet Presented one so welcome as I know,

You will be to my lady.

Mar. This is some vision;

Or, sure, these men are mad, to worship a dunghill;
It cannot be a truth.

Well. Be still a pagan,

An unbelieving infidel; be so, miscreant,

And meditate on blankets, and on dog-whips!

Enter FURNACE, L. s. E.-Comes between WELL.

and MAR.

Fur. I'm glad you're come; until I know your pleasüre,

I knew not how to serve up my lady's dinner.

Mar. His pleasure! is it possible?

Well. What's thy will?

Fur. Marry, sir, I have

Some rails and quails, and my lady will'd me ask you, What kind of sauces best affect your palate,

That I may use my utmost skill to please it.

[WELLBORN whispers FURNACE up the Stage. Mar. Walking about, amazed.] The devil's enter'd this cook: sauce for his palate,

That, on my knowledge,

Durst wish but cheese-parings and brown bread on Sun

days!