adviser to many literary men of distinction, and therefore understood the nervous temperament which often belongs to men of letters. The Memoirs continue: April 28.-At Oxford, very pleasant time. April 29.-A little, not acutely, depressed and that in spite of the English Literature Scholarship being announced. I note the change to Oxford has done me no good. I must add that for the last week I have been better in the mornings. I mean no intolerably acute attacks. Thursday, May 2.-Dreary thoughts about the future. only solace thoughts of dear ones at home. What I seem to have got is the power of doing my work faithfully and thoroughly without the support of good spirits and the old keen love of work the cheery elasticity and "lilt" which used to carry me along so bravely and happily. I suppose it will never come back again: perhaps it will. [I may mention that during the whole of this time there have been innumerable reviews of my books. . . . Neither the favourable ones, nor the unfavourable have had the slightest effect on my spirits the one giving me no pleasure, and the others no annoyance, complete indifference two, I answered because my reputation for honesty and competence was at stake & I thought I owed this to those at home.] For one thing I am most grateful-more than once it seemed that I should utterly break down & not be able to carry on my work, particularly the unprepared lectures on Ruskin & Euripides, but I have thoroughly & competently done every scrap. Since May 23rd to June 7, present date, I have quite regained my former state-all depression having passed entirely away-spirits uniformly cheerful. ... The strange thing is that there has been no reason at all for the change nor has it been aided by any means in my power. The one thing which I have certainly found to be beneficial was a cold plunge in the morning. . . . This attack has shown me that what I have been suffering from was a disease as much out of my power to prevent or cure as any other physical disease could be. I have no defence from it in myself-in my own will-power. It may, I feel, attack me again and I shall be helpless against it-the will power merely consisting in the power of bearing the malady and in not allowing it to interfere with my work, but under the strain of its misery I am and probably must be purely passive. How purely unconnected with any cause such an attack is, is shown by the fact that though towards the end of June I had real cause for depression, I had no depression at all. July 3.-Very bad attack in the morning-all seems coming back again. July 4.-It is so, it has all come back again. Q Then the record goes on as before: he goes to Cromer and has "one of the most frightful if not the most frightful day in my life." He says, however: "It seems clear that the sea-breeze has an appreciably good and direct effect on my malady, does soothe tho' not drive it away. Have slept excellently at nights, going to bed between 10 & 11, and sleeping almost at once till morning." He then goes to Oxford: "flashes of happiness occasionally irradiate the gloom or sombre grey of existence." He then begins to improve. Aug. 30.-... The change has undoubtedly done me much good. . . Sep. 23.-Had a fortnight's visit to Shapwickgot on very well and happily till about four days before I left-depression then recommenced; I left for home and have had a terrible time again, the Fiend quite laying hold of me again. Have therefore determined this morning to try what getting up at 6.15, & having a bathe in the Serpentine before breakfast will do. Sep. 24.-Had my first bathe in the Serpentine at 7.20 this morning: did me immense good. Oct. 7.—I have bathed regularly every morning but one, and it has simply cured me completely of all my depression. I have ever since been perfectly happy and contented, not a jot of depression near me. I never dreamt I could recover so com pletely. What a change, a blessing! I believe it was this bathing. Oct. 16.-Bathe nearly every morning, health & spirits splendid. End of 1901. It is now Jan. 24th, 1902, & since the last entry Oct., 16, I have not had one moment's low spirits or depression. The same now. I write this on Hampstead Heath, June 27th, 1903. As the winter came on, he gave up going to the Serpentine, and had his cold bath at home. Soon, however, he was obliged to give this up too, as the cold water began to set up rheumatism. However, his cure was for the time being complete. He was his own cheery self again. CHAPTER XVI THE DEATH OF CANON HARFORD-PARKHURST PRISON CONAN DOYLE THE CHARGE OF -SIR A. THE LIGHT BRIGADE-AN AFTERNOON WITH O 66 N Nov. 11th, 1906, my father writes in his "commonplace" book : Last night, Nov. 10th, 1906, as I was on my way back to De Vere Gardens1 from the Athenæum Club, it struck me that I would look in on my old friend, Minor Canon F. K. Harford, in Deans Yard. Mrs Smith said I 1 He and those of the family then at home were temporarily staying at the Prince of Wales Hotel, De Vere Gardens, Kensington, prior to moving to his last home, 8в Portman Mansions, Baker Street. 2 Minor Canon of Westminster-also an accomplished linguist, composer of music, sculptor and poet. He boasted that he could make an impromptu rhymed verse from any word suggested to him :— * A genuine rhyme for Kennedy? Just wait a minute, There oughtn't to be any di- * What! No one ever found a rhyme for month? If Jo dare laugh-I'll say that he's a dunth. Afterwards published in a book: "Epigrammatica," Hy. Sotheran. |