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MERRY WIVES OF WINDSOR.

ACT I. SCENE I.

WINDSOR. Before PAGE's House.

Enter Justice SHALLOW, SLENDER, and Sir HUGH

EVANS.

Shallow.

SIR IR Hugh, perfuade me not; I will make a Star-chamber matter of it; if he were twenty fir John Falstaffs, he shall not abuse Robert Shallow, efquire.

Slen. In the county of Glofter, juftice of peace, and coram. Shal. Ay, coufin Slender, and Cuft-alorum.

Slen. Ay, and ratolorum too; and a gentleman born, mafter parfon; who writes himself armigero; in any bill, warrant, quittance, or obligation, armigero.

Shal. Ay, that we do; and have done any time thefe three hundred years.

Slen. All his fucceffors, gone before him, have done't; and all his ancestors, that come after him, may: they may give the dozen white luces in their coat.

Shal. It is an old coat.

Eva. The dozen white loufes do become an old coat well; it agrees well, paffant: it is a familiar beast to man, and fignifies-love.

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Shal.

Shal. The luce is the fresh fish; the falt fish is an old

coat.

Slen. I may quarter, coz ?

Shal. You may, by marrying.

Eva. It is marring indeed, if he quarter it.

Shal. Not a whit.

Eva. Yes, py'r-lady; if he has a quarter of your coat, there is but three skirts for yourself, in my fimple conjectures; but that is all one: If fir John Falstaff have committed difparagements unto you, I am of the church, and will be glad to do my benevolence, to make atonements and compromises between you.

Shal. The Council fhall hear it; it is a riot.

Eva. It is not meet the Council hear a riot; there is no fear of Got in a riot; the Council, look you, fhall defire to hear the fear of Got, and not to hear a riot; take your vizaments in that.

Shal. Ha! o' my life, if I were young again, the sword fhould end it.

Eva. It is petter that friends is the fword, and end it: and there is also another device in my prain, which, peradventure, prings goot difcretions with it: There is Anne Page, which is daughter to master George Page, which is pretty virginity.

Slen. Mistress Anne Page? She has brown hair, and fpeaks fmall like a woman.

Eva. It is that fery verfon for all the 'orld, as just as you will defire; and seven hundred pounds of monies, and gold, and filver, is her grandfire, upon his death'sbed (Got deliver to a joyful refurrections!) give, when fhe is able to overtake feventeen years old: it were a goot motion, if we leave our pribbles and prabbles, and defire a marriage between master Abraham, and mistress Anne Page.

Shal.

Shal. Did her grandfire leave her feven hundred pound? Eva. Ay, and her father is make her a petter penny. Shal. I know the young gentlewoman; he has good gifts.

Eva. Seven hundred pounds, and poffibilities, is good gifts.

Shal. Well, let us fee honest mafter Page: Is Falstaff there?

true.

Eva. Shall I tell you a lie? I do despise a liar, as I do despise one that is false; or, as I defpife one that is not The knight, fir John, is there; and, I beseech you, be ruled by your well-willers. I will peat the door [knocks] for mafter Page. What, hoa! Got pless your house here!

Page. Who's there?

Enter PAGE.

Eva. Here is Got's pleffing, and your friend, and justice Shallow and here young mafter Slender; that, peradventures, fhall tell you another tale, if matters grow to your likings.

Page. I am glad to fee your worships well: I thank you for my venifon, master Shallow.

Shal. Mafter Page, I am glad to see you; Much good do it your good heart! I wish'd your venifon better; it was ill kill'd.—How doth good Miftrefs Page?—and I love you always with my heart, la; with my heart.

Page. Sir, I thank you.

Shal. Sir, I thank you; by yea and no, I do.

Page. I am glad to see you, good master Slender. Slen. How does your fallow greyhound, fir? I heard fay, he was out-run on Cotfale.

Page. It could not be judg'd, fir.

Slen. You'll not confefs, you'll not confefs.

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Shal. That he will not;-'tis your fault, 'tis your fault-Tis a good dog.

Page. A cur, fir.

Shal. Sir, he's a good dog, and a fair dog; can there be more faid? he is good, and fair.-Is fir John Falstaff here?

Page. Sir, he is within; and I would I could do a good office between you.

Eva. It is fpoke as a chriftians ought to speak.

Shal. He hath wrong'd me, mafter Page.

Page. Sir, he doth in fome fort confefs it.

Shal. If it be confefs'd, it is not redrefs'd; is not that fo, mafter Page? He hath wrong'd me;-indeed, he hath;-at a word, he hath ;-believe me ;-Robert Shallow, efquire, faith he is wrong'd.

Page. Here comes fir John.

Enter Sir JOHN FALSTAFF, BARDOLPH, NYм, and PISTOL.

Fal. Now, mafter Shallow, you'll complain of me to the king?

Shal. Knight, you have beaten my men, kill'd my deer, and broke open my lodge.

Fal. But not kifs'd your keeper's daughter?

Shal. Tut, a pin! this fhall be anfwer'd.

Fal. I will answer it straight ;-I have done all this: That is now answer'd.

Shal. The Council fhall know this.

Fal. 'Twere better for you, if it were known in coun fel: you'll be laugh'd at.

Eva. Pauca verba, fir John; good worts.

Fal. Good worts! good cabbage.-Slender, I broke your head: What matter have you against me?

Slen. Marry, fir, I have matter in my head against you;

and against your coney-catching rafcals, Bardolph, Nym, and Pistol. They carried me to the tavern, and made me drunk, and afterwards pick'd my pocket.

Bar. You Banbury cheese!

Slen. Ay, it is no matter.

Pift. How, now, Mephoftophilus?

Slen. Ay, it is no matter.

Nym. Slice, I fay! pauca, pauca; flice! that's my hu

mour.

Slen. Where's Simple, my man ?-Can you tell, cousin ? Eva. Peace: I pray you! Now let us understand: There is three umpires in this matter, as I understand: that is-master Page, fidelicet, master Page; and there is myself, fidelicet, myself; and the three party is, lastly and finally, mine host of the Garter.

Page. We three to hear it, and end it between them. Eva. Fery goot: I will make a prief of it in my notebook; and we will afterwards 'ork upon the cause, with as great difcreetly as we can.

Fal. Piftol

Pift. He hears with ears.

Eva. The tevil and his tam! what phrafe is this,

He hears with ears? Why, it is affectations.

Fal. Piftol, did you pick master Slender's purse?

Slen. Ay, by these gloves, did he, (or I would I might never come in mine own great chamber again elfe) of seven groats in mill-fixpences, and two Edward fhovel-boards, that coft me two fhilling and two pence a-piece of Yead Miller, by thefe gloves.

Fal. Is this true, Pistol?

Eva. No; it is falfe, if it is a pick-purfe.

Pift. Ha, thou mountain-foreigner!-Sir John, and mafter mine,

I combat challenge of this latten bilbo :

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