Or are you like the painting of a sorrow, A face without a heart? Laer. Why ask you this? King. Not that I think, you did not love your father; But that I know, love is begun by time; A kind of wick, or snuff, that will abate it; Dies in his own too-much: That we would do, We should do when we would; for this would changes, And hath abatements and delays as many, Laer. To cut his throat i'the church. King. No place, indeed, should murder sanctuarize; Revenge should have no bounds. But, good Laertes, Will you do this, keep close within your chamber: Hamlet, return'd, shall know you are come home : We'll put on those shall praise your excellence, And set a double varnish on the fame The Frenchman gave you; bring you, in fine, together, And wager o'er your heads: he, being remiss, I will do't: Laer. And, for the purpose, I'll anoint my sword. I bought an unction of a mountebank, So mortal, that but dip a knife in it, Where it draws blood, no cataplasm so rare, Collected from all simples that have virtue Under the moon, can save the thing from death, That is but scratch'd withal: I'll touch my point With this contagion; that, if I gall him slightly, It may be death. King. Weigh, what convenience, both of time and means, May fit us to our shape: if this should fail, Let's further think of this; And that our drift look through our bad performance, 'Twere better not assay'd; therefore this project When in your motion you are hot and dry, How now, sweet queen? Queen. One woe doth tread upon another's heel, So fast they follow :-Your sister's drown'd, Laertes. Laer. Drown'd! O, where ? Queen. There is a willow grows ascaunt the brook, Unto that element: but long it could not be, Laer. Alas then, she is drown'd? Queen. Drown'd, drown'd. Laer. Too much of water hast thou, poor Ophelia, And therefore I forbid my tears: But yet It is our trick; nature her custom holds, I have a speech of fire, that fain would blaze, [Erit ACT V. SCENE I.-A Church-Yara. 1 Clo. Is she to be buried in christian burial, that wilfully seeks her own salvation? 2 Clo. I tell thee, she is; therefore make her grave straight the crowner hath set on her, and finds it christian burial. 1 Clo. How can that be, unless she drowned herself in her own defence? 2 Clo. Why, 'tis found so. 1 Co. It must be se offendendo; it cannot be else. For here lies the point :" If I drown myself wittingly, it argues an act: and an act hath three branches; it is, to act, to do, and to perform: Argal, she drowned berself wittingly. 2 Clo. Nay, but hear you, goodman delver. 1 Clo. Give me leave. Here lies the water; good: here stands the man; good: If the man go to this water, and drown himself, it is, will he, nill he, he goes; mark you that: but if the water come to him, and drown him, he drowns not himself: Argal, he, that is not guilty of his own death, shortens not his own life. 2 Clo. But is this law? 1 Clo. Ay, marry is't; crowner's-quest law. 2 Clo. Will you ha' the truth on't? If this had | Such-a-one's horse, when he meant to beg it; might not been a gentlewoman, she should have been bu- it not? ried out of christian burial. 1 Clo. Why, there thou say'st: And the more pity; that great folks shall have countenance in this world to drown or hang themselves, more than their even christian. Come, my spade. There is no ancient gentlemen but gardeners, ditchers, and gravemakers; they hold up Adam's profession. 2 Clo. Was he a gentleman? 1 Clo. He was the first that ever bore arms. 2 Clo. Why, he had none. 1 Clo. What, art a heathen? How dost thou understand the scripture? The scripture says, Adam digged; Could he dig without arms? I'll put another question to thee: if thou answerest me not to the purpose, confess thyself 2 Clo. Go to. 1 Clo. What is he, that builds stronger than either the mason, the shipwright, or the carpenter? 2 Clo. The gallows-maker; for that frame outlives a thousand tenants. 1 Clo. I like thy wit well, in good faith; the gallows does well: But how does it well? it does well to those that do ill now thou dost ill, to say, the gallows is built stronger than the church; argal, the gallows may do well to thee. To't again; come. 2 Clo. Who builds stronger than a mason, a shipwright, or a carpenter? 1 Clo. Ay, tell me that, and unyoke. 2 Clo. Marry, now I can tell. 1 Clo. To't. 2 Clo. Mass, I cannot tell. Enter HAMLET and HORATIO, at a distance. 1 Clo. Cudgel thy brains no more about it; for your dull ass will not mend his pace with beating: and, when you are asked this question next, say, a grave-maker; the houses that he makes, last till doomsday. Go, get thee to Yaughan, and fetch me a stoup of liquor. [Exit 2 Clown. 1 Clown digs, and sings. In youth, when I did love, did love, To contract, 0, the time, for, ah, my behove Ham. Has this fellow no feeling of his business? he sings at grave-making. Hor. Custom hath made it in him a property of easiness. Ham. Tis e'en so: the hand of little employment hath the daintier sense. 1 Clo. But age, with his stealing steps, Hath claw'd me in his clutch, And hath shipped me into the land, Ham. That scull had a tongue in it, and could sing once: How the knave jowls it to the ground, as if it were Cain's jaw-bone, that did the first murder! This might be the pate of a politician, which this ass now o'er-reaches; one that would circumvent God, might it not? Hor. It might, my lord. Ham. Or of a courtier; which could say, Goodmorrow, sweet lord! How dost thou, good lord? This might be my lord Such-a-one, that praised my lord Hor. Ay, my lord. Ham. There's another: Why may not that be the scull of a lawyer? Where be his quiddits now, his quillets, his cases, his tenures, and his tricks? why does he suffer this rude knave now to knock him about the sconce with a dirty shovel, and will not tell him of his action of battery? Humph! This fellow might be in's time a great buyer of land, with his statutes, his recognizances, his fines, his double vouchers, his recoveries: Is this the fine of his fines, and the recovery of his recoveries, to have his fine pate full of fine dirt? will his vouchers vouch him no more of his purchases, and double ones too, than the length and breadth of a pair of indentures? The very conveyances of his lands will hardly lie in this box; and must the inheritor himself have no more? ha? Hor. Not a jot more, my lord. Ham. Is not parchment made of sheep-skins? Hor. Aye, my lord, and of calves-skins too. Ham. They are sheep, and calves, which seek out assurance in that. I will speak to this fellow : Whose grave's this, sirrah? 1 Clo. Mine, sir. O, a pit of clay for to be made For such a guest is meet. : [Sings. Ham. I think it be thine, indeed; for thou liest in't. 1 Clo. You lie out on't, sir, and therefore it is not yours for my part, I do not lie in't, yet it is mine. Ham. Thou dost lie in't, to be in't, and say it is thine 'tis for the dead, not for the quick; therefore thou liest. 1 Clo. 'Tis a quick lie, sir; 'twill away again, from me to you. Ham. What man dost thou dig it for? 1 Clo. For no man, sir. Ham. What woman then? 1 Clo. For none neither. Ham. Who is to be buried in't? 1 Clo. One that was a woman, sir; but, rest her soul, she's dead. Ham. How absolute the knave is! we must speak by the card, or equivocation will undo us. By the lord, Horatio, these three years I have taken note of it; the age is grown so picked, that the toe of the peasant comes so near the heel of the courtier, he galls his kibe. - How long hast thou been a grave maker? 1 Clo. Of all the days i'the year, I came to't that day that our last king Hamlet overcame Fortinbras. Ham. How long's that since? 1 Clo. Cannot you tell that? every fool can tell that: It was that very day that young Hamlet was born: he that is mad, and sent into England. Ham. Ay, marry, why was he sent into England? 1 Clo. Why, because he was mad: he shall recover his wits there; or, if he do not, 'tis no great matter there. Ham. Why? 1 Clo. 'Twill not be seen in him there; there the men are as mad as he. Ham. How came he mad?" 1 Clo. Very strangely, they say. Ham. How strangely? 1 Clo. 'Faith, e'en with losing his wits. Ham. Upon what ground? 1 Clo. Why, here in Denmark; I have been sexton here, man, and boy, thirty years. Ham. How long will a man lie i'the earth ere he rot? 1 Clo. 'Faith, if he be not rotten before he die, (as we have many pocky corses now-a-days, that will scarce hold the laying in,) he will last you some eight year, or nine year: a tanner will last you nine Ham. Alas, poor Yorick! - I knew him, Horatio; a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy: he hath borne me on his back a thousand times; and now how abhorred in my imagination it is! my gorge rises at it. Here hung those lips that I have kissed I know not how oft. Where be your gibes now? your gambols? your songs? your flashes of merriment, that were wont to set the table on a roar? Not one now, to mock your own grinning? quite chap-fallen? Now get you to my lady's chamber, and tell her, let her paint an inch thick, to this favour she must come; make her laugh at that. Pr'ythee, Horatio, tell me one thing. Hor. What's that, my lord? O, that the earth, which kept the world in awe, The queen, the courtiers: Who is this they follow? Ham. A very noble youth: Mark. 1 Priest. Her obsequies have been as far enlarg'd Laer. Must there no more be done? No more be done! O, treble woe Fall ten times treble on that cursed head, Ham. Dost thou think, Alexander looked o'this To o'er-top old Pelion, or the skyish head fashion i'the earth? Hor. E'en so. Ham. And smelt so? pah! [Throws down the scull. Hor. E'en so, my lord. Hor. 'Twere to consider too curiously, to consider so. Ham. No, faith, not a jot; but to follow him thither with modesty enough, and likelihood to lead it: As thus; Alexander died, Alexander was buried, Alexander returneth to dust; the dust is earth; of earth we make loam: And why of that loam, whereto he was converted, might they not stop a beer-barrel? Imperious Cæsar, dead, and turn'd to clay, Of blue Olympus. Ham. [Advancing.] What is he, whose grief [Leaps into the grave. Ham. Thou pray st not well. I pr'ythee, take thy fingers from my throat; All. Gentlemen, Hor. Hamlet, Hamlet! Good my lord, be quiet. [The Attendants part them, and they come out of the grave. Ham. Why, I will fight with him upon this | No, not to stay the grinding of the axe, theme, Until my eyelids will no longer wag. Queen. O my son! what theme? Ham. I lov'd Ophelia; forty thousand brothers Could not, with all their quantity of love, What wilt thou do for her? King. O, he is mad, Laertes. Make up my sum. What is the reason, that you use me thus? We'll put the matter to the present push. Till then, in patience our proceeding be. [Exeunt. Is't possible? Ham. Here's the commission; read it at more leisure. But wilt thou hear now how I did proceed? Ham. Being thus benetted round with villainies, A baseness to write fair, and labour'd much Hor. Ay, good my lord. Ham. An earnest conjuration from the king, As England was his faithful tributary; As love between them like the palm might flourish; Hor. How was this seal'd? Hum. Why, even in that was heaven ordinant ; I had my father's signet in my purse, Which was the model of that Danish seal : Folded the writ up in form of the other; Subscrib'd it; gave't the impression; plac'd it safely, The changeling never known: Now, the next day Was our sea-fight and what to this was sequent Thou know'st already. : Hor. So Guildenstern and Rosencrantz go to't. Ham. Why, man, they did make love to this employment; They are not near my conscience; their defeat 'Tis dangerous, when the baser nature comes Hor. Why, what a king is this! Ham. Does it not, think thee, stand me now upon? He that hath kill'd my king, and whor'd my mother; Popp'd in between the election and my hopes; Thrown out his angle for my proper life, And with such cozenage; is't not perfect conscience, To quit him with this arm? and is't not to be damn'd, To let this canker of our nature come When our deep plots do pall; and that should In further evil? teach us, Ham. Up from my cabin, My sea-gown scarf'd about me, in the dark Grop'd I to find out them: had my desire; Finger'd their packet; and, in fine, withdrew To mine own room again: making so bold, My fears forgetting manners, to unseal Their grand commission; where I found, Horatio, A royal knavery; an exact command, Larded with many several sorts of reasons, Importing Denmark's health, and England's too, With, ho! such bugs and goblins in my life, That, on the supervise, no leisure bated, Hor. It must be shortly known to him from England, What is the issue of the business there. Ham. It will be short: the interim is mine; For by the image of my cause, I see The portraiture of his: I'll court his favours: Peace; who comes here? Osr. Your lordship is right welcome back to Denmark. Ham. I humbly thank you, sir. this water-fly? Hor. No, my good lord. Ham. Thy state is the more gracious; for 'tis a vice to know him: He hath much land, and fertile: let a beast be lord of beasts, and his crib shall stand at the king's mess: 'Tis a chough; but, as I say, spacious in the possession of dirt. Osr. Sweet lord, if your lordship were at leisure, I should impart a thing to you from his majesty. Ham. I will receive it, sir, with all diligence of spirit: Your bonnet to his right use; 'tis for the head. Osr. I thank your lordship, 'tis very hot. Ham. No, believe me, 'tis very cold; the wind is northerly. Osr. It is indifferent cold, my lord, indeed. Ham. But yet, methinks, it is very sultry and hot; or my complexion Osr. Exceedingly, my lord; it is very sultry, as 'twere, I cannot tell how. My lord, his majesty bade me signify to you, that he has laid a great wager on your head: Sir, this is the matter, Ham. I beseech you, remember [HAMLET moves him to put on his hat. Osr. Nay, good my lord; for my case, in good faith. Sir, here is newly come to court, Laertes: believe me, an absolute gentleman, full of most excellent differences, of very soft society, and great showing: Indeed, to speak feelingly of him, he is the card or calendar of gentry, for you shall find in him the continent of what part a gentleman would see. Ham. Sir, his definement suffers no perdition in you; though, I know, to divide him inventorially, would dizzy the arithmetick of memory; and yet but yaw neither, in respect of his quick sail. But, in the verity of extolment, I take him to be a soul of great article; and his infusion of such dearth and rareness, as, to make true diction of him, his semblable is his mirrour; and, who else would trace him, his umbrage, nothing more. Osr. Your lordship speaks most infallibly of him. Ham. The concernancy, sir? why do we wrap the gentleman in our more rawer breath? Osr. Sir? Hor. Is't not possible to understand in another tongue? You will do't, sir, really. Ham. What imports the nomination of this gentleman ? Osr. Of Laertes ? as I take it, six French rapiers and poniards, with their assigns, as girdle, hangers, and so: Three of the carriages, in faith, are very dear to fancy, very responsive to the hilts, most delicate carriages, and of very liberal conceit. Ham. What call you the carriages? Hor. I knew, you must be edified by the margent, ere you had done. Osr. The carriages, sir, are the hangers. Ham. The phrase would be more german to the matter, if we could carry a cannon by our sides; I would, it might be hangers till then. But, on Six Barbary horses against six French swords, their assigns, and three liberal conceited carriages, that's the French bet against the Danish: Why is this impawned, as you call it? Osr. The king, sir, hath laid, that in a dozen passes between yourself and him, he shall not exceed you three hits; he hath laid, on twelve for nine; and it would come to immediate trial, if your lordship would vouchsafe the answer. Ham. How, if I answer, no? Osr. I mean, my lord, the opposition of your person in trial. Ham. Sir, I will walk here in the hall; If it please his majesty, it is the breathing time of day with me: let the foils be brought, the gentleman willing, and the king hold his purpose, I will win for him, if I can; if not, I will gain nothing but my shame, and the odd hits. Osr. Shall I deliver you so? Ham. To this effect, sir; after what flourish your nature will. -- Osr. I commend my duty to your lordship. [Exit. Ham. Yours, yours. He does well to commend it himself; there are no tongues else for's turn. Hor. This lapwing runs away with the shell on his head. Ham. He did comply with his dug, before he sucked it. Thus has he (and many more of the same breed, that, I know, the drossy age dotes on,) only got the tune of the time, and outward habit of encounter, a kind of yesty collection, which carries them through and through the most fan'd and winnowed opinions; and do but blow them to their trial, the bubbles are out. Enter a Lord. Lord. My lord, his majesty commended him tc you by young Osric, who brings back to him, that you attend him in the hall: He sends to know, if Hor. His purse is empty already; all his golden your pleasure hold to play with Laertes, or that you words are spent. Ham. Of him, sir. Osr. I know, you are not ignorant Ham. I would, you did, sir; yet, in faith, if you did, it would not much approve me; Well, sir. Osr. You are not ignorant of what excellence Laertes isHam. I dare not confess that, lest I should compare with him in excellence; but, to know a man well, were to know himself. will take longer time. Ham. I am constant to my purposes, they follow the king's pleasure: if his fitness speaks, mine is ready; now, or whensoever, provided I be so able as now. Lord. The king, and queen, and all are coming down. Ham. In happy time. Lord. The queen desires you, to use some gentle entertainment to Laertes, before you fall to play. Ham. She well instructs me. [Exit Lord. Hor. You will lose this wager, my lord. Ham. I do not think so; since he went into France, I have been in continual practice; I shall win at the odds. But thou would'st not think, how i all's here about my heart: but it is no matter. Hor. Nay, good my lord, |