LETHE. A BALLAD.

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THE FIRST STANZA BY GARRICK.

YE mortals, whom fancies and troubles perplex, "Whom folly misguides, and infirmities vex;

"Whose lives hardly know what it is to be blest, "Who rise without joy, and lie down without rest: "Obey the glad summons, to Lethe repair, "Drink deep of the stream, and forget all your care.”

The lawyer, whom Lethe prepares for a plea,
Shall remember his duty, forgetting his fee;

The doctor by kindness, not Latin, shall win ye,

And shall ask for your health ere he look for your guinea. Obey then the summons, &c.

The bard shall find mutton more savoury than grass is, And to sup in a tavern than starve on Parnassus; While his lofty heroicks, and loftier garret,

He forgets in brisk trade, and snug rooms, and cool claret.

Obey then, &c.

No more shall the student suck old Alma Mater,
But leave college and port, for elysium and water,
Leave his whims and bocardos to boys and the rabble,
And know, man's chief end is not merely to squabble.
Obey then, &c.

The soldier, for once if a soldier will deign
To drink vapid Lethe for sprightly champaign,
Shall perceive a distinction of courage from oaths,
And of love to his country from love to his cloaths.
Obey then, &c.

But ye who would scruple to journey so far on,
To shiver* on Styx, or to wrangle with Charon,
May sit still, if oblivion be all that ye ask,
And rejoice in the Lethe that spouts from the cask.
Obey then the summons, to Hogshead repair,
Drink deep of that stream, and forget all your care.

* Illa quidem Stygia nabat jam frigida cymbà.

THE

DESCENT OF TIMOTHY.*

TIM crawl'd on board; no phiz e'er sadder ;
Step'd backward down the coal-black ladder;
Then twisting sidelong, like a crab, in,
Stagger'd into the after cabin.

Him spied the dog of Newfoundland,
That by a bulk-head chanced to stand;
His chaps, whence fat and froth distill'd,
With well-gnaw'd bones of bull-beef fill'd;
Straight with neck upstretch'd he howls,
Eyes that glare, and throat that growls,
And with vociferations vain
Stuns the poor preacher's dizzy brain.
Onward his tottering Reverence hitches,
The deck beneath him rolls and pitches,
Till from its shelf an empty keg

Down dancing drives against his leg.

*This parody of Gray's Descent of Odin alludes to some things that occurred in the course of a voyage to London.

Pensive on a cask of gin

He sat, and stroked his aching shin;

While near him snored in drunken state
The carcass of the slumbering mate.
Facing to a starboard beam

Tim put to flight the seaman's dream,
Discharging thrice, in accents dread,
Yells, that almost might wake the dead;
Till the toss'd blankets part asunder,

And forth these sullen grumblings thunder.

MATE. What rascal with his thumps and screaming

Dares break the quiet of my dreaming?

Whose hand is this that pulls my head,

Labouring to lug me out of bed?

These ears have heard for weeks together

The long long roar of wintry weather,
Pumps, waves, ropes rattling, tempest squalling;
But such a pinching, and a bawling-

Zounds, I believe he'll twist my neck

On deck, there, ho! ye dogs on deck,
What means this execrable yelling?

Have ye

let all the fiends of hell in?

TIM. A traveller I, to thee unknown,

An honest man's and woman's son;

By hunger, thirst, and sickness undone,
And bound to Redriff first, then London.
But whose is that mug, pray? and spread
For whom yon comfortable bed?

MATE. The bed's our captain's bed, d'ye see-
I wish you'd let a body be-

The mug, you mean that has the grog in?
That, master, is the captain's noggin.

He, good soul, must have his potion:
Thirst can reach the sons of ocean.
Unwilling I my lips unclose;

Leave me, leave me, to repose.
TIM. Once again my call obey,

Master mate, awake and say,

Pray have ye one for me, or no?

MATE. There on the floor mattress and bolster are;

Who wish for more may ask th' upholsterer.

Now my weary lips I close;

Leave me, leave me, to repose.

TIM. Master mate, my call obey, Rouse yourself once more and say, If in this ship a poor starved sinner May sup; to-day I had no dinner.