King. Will you hear this letter with attention? Cost. Such is the simplicity of man to hearken after the flesh. King. [Reads.] Great deputy, the welkin's vicegereat, and sole dominator of Navarre, my soul's earth's Cod, and body's fostering patron,→→ Cast. Not a word of Costard yet. King. So it is, Cost. It may be so: but if he say it is so, he is, in telling true, but so, so. King. Peace. Cost. -be to me, and every man that dares not fight! Cost.-of other men's secrets, I beseech you. King. So it is, besieged with sable-coloured melancholy, I did commend the black-oppressing humour to the most wholesome physic of thy health-giving air; and, as I am a gentleman, betook myself to walk. The time when? About the sixth hour; when beasts most graze, birds best peck, and men sit down to that nourishment which is called supper. So much for the time when: Now for the ground which; which, I mean, I walked upon: it is ycleped, thy park. Then for the place where; where, I mean, I did encounter that obscene and most preposterous event, that draweth from my snow-white pen the ebon-coloured ink, which here thou viewest, beholdest, surveyest, or seest : But to the place, where,-It standeth north-north-east and by east from the west corner of thy curious-knotted garden: There did I see that low-spirited swain. that base minnow of thy mirth. [Cost. Me] that unletter'd small-knowing soul, [Cost. Me.] that shallow vassal, [Cost. Still me.] which, as I remember, hight Costard, [Cost. O me!] sorted and consorted, contrary to they established proclaimed edict and continent canen, with-with,-0 with-but with this I passion to say wherewith, Cast. With a wench. Cost. If it were, I deny her virginity; I was taken with a maid. King. This maid will not serve your turn, sir. Cost. I had rather pray a month with mutton and porridge. King. And Don Armado shall be your keeper.My lord Biron, see him deliver'd o'er. And go we, lords, to put in practice that Which each to other hath so strongly sworn. [Exe. King, Longaville, and Dumain. Biron. I'll lay my head to any good man's hat, These oaths and laws will prove an idle scorn.Sirrah, come on. Cost. I suffer for the truth, sir: for true it is, I was taken with Jaquenetta, and Jaquenetta is a true girl; and therefore, Welcome the sour eup of prosperity! Affliction may one day smile again, and till then, Sit thee down, sorrow! [Exeunt. SCENE II.-Another part of the same. Armado's Arm. Boy, what sign is it, when a man of great spirit grows melancholy? Moth. A great sign, sir, that he will look sad. Arm. Why, sadness is one and the self-same thing, dear imp. Moth. No, no; O lord, sir, no. Arm. How eanst thou part sadness and melancholy, my tender juvenal? Moth. By a familiar demonstration of the working, my tough senior. Arm. Why tough senior? why tough senior? Moth. Why tender juvenal? why tender juvenal ? Arm. I spoke it, tender juvenal, as a congruent epitheton, appertaining to thy young days, which we may nominate tender. Moth. And I, tough senior, as an appertinent title to your old time, which we may name tough. Arm. Pretty, and apt. King. -with a child of our grandmother Eve, a fe male; or, for thy more sweet understanding, a woman. Him I (as my ever-esteemed duty pricks me on) have sent to thee, to receive the meed of punish-apt? or I apt, and my saying pretty? ment, by thy sweet grace's officer, Antony Dull; aman of good repute, carriage, bearing, and estimation. Moth. How mean you, sir? I pretty, and my saying Dull. Me, an't shall please you; Iam Antony Dull. King. For Jaquenetta, (so is the weaker vessel called, which I apprehended with the aforesaid swain,) I keep her as a vessel of thy law's fury; and shall, at the least of thy sweet notice, bring her to trial. Thine, in all compliments of devoted and heart-burning heat of duty. Don Adriano de Armado. Biron. This is not so well as I looked for, but the best that ever I heard. King. Ay, the best for the worst.-But, sirrah, what say you to this? Cest. Sir. I confess the wench. King. Did you hear the proclamation? Cost. I do confess much of the hearing it, but little of the marking of it. King. It was proclaimed a year's imprisonment, to be taken with a wench. Cast. I was taken with none, sir, I was taken with a damosel. King. Well, it was proclaimed damosel. Cest. This was no damosel neither, sir; she was a virgin. King. It is so varied too; for it was proclaimed, virgin. Arm. Thou pretty, because little. Moth. Little pretty, because little: Wherefore apt? Moth. I will praise an eel with the same praise, Arm. I do say, thou art quick in answers: Thou heatest my blood. Moth. I am answered, sir. Arm. I love not to be crossed. Moth. He speaks the mere contrary, crosses love Moth. You may do it in an hour, sir. Moth. How many is one thrice told? Arm. I am ill at reckoning, it fitteth the spirit of a tapster. Moth. You are a gentleman, and a gamester, sir. Arm. I confess both; they are both the varnish of a complete man. Moth. Then, I am sure, you know how much the gross sum of dence-ace amounts to. Arm. I will hereupon confess, I am in love: and, as it is base for a soldier to love, so am I in love with a base wench. If drawing my sword against the humour of affection would deliver me from the reprobate thought of it, I would take desire prisoner, and ransom him to any French courtier for a new devised courtesy. I think scorn to sigh; methinks, I should out-swear Cupid.-Comfort me, boy: What great men have been in love? Moth. Hercules, master. Arm. Most sweet Hercules-More authority, dear boy, name more; and, sweet my child, let them be men of good repute and carriage. Moth. Samson, master: he was a man of good carriage, great carriage; for he carried the town-gates on his back, like a porter: and he was in love. Arm. O well-knit Samson! strong-jointed Samson! I do excel thee in my rapier, as much as thou didst me in carrying gates. I am in love too.-Who was Samson's love, my dear moth? Moth. A woman, master. Arm. Of what complexion? Moth. Of all the four, or the three, or the two; or one of the four. Arm. Tell me precisely of what complexion ? Arm. Is that one of the four complexions? too. Arm. Green, indeed, is the colour of lovers: but to have a love of that colour, methinks, Samson had small reason for it. He, surely, affected her for her wit. Moth. It was so, sir; for she had a green wit. Arm. My love is most immaculate white and red. Moth. Most maculate thoughts, master, are masked under such colours. Arm. Define, define, well-educated infant. Moth. My father's wit, and my mother's tongue, assist me! Arm. Sweet invocation of a child; most pretty, and pathetical! Moth. If she be made of white and red, Her faults will ne'er be known; For blushing cheeks by faults are bred, By this you shall not know ; Which native she doth owe. A dangerous rhyme, master, against the reason of white and red. Arm. Is there not a ballad, boy, of the King and the Begear? Math. The world was very guilty of such a ballad some three ages since: but, I think, now 'tis not to be found; or, if it were, it would neither serve for the writing, nor the tune. Arm. I will have the subject newly writ o'er, that I may example my digression by some mighty prece dent. Boy, I do love that country girl, that I took in the park with the rational hind Costard; she deserves well, Moth. To be whipped; and yet a better love than [Aside. my master. Arm. Siug, boy; my spirit grows heavy in love. Moth. Forbear till this company be past. Enter Dull, Costard, and Jaquenetta. Dull. Sir, the duke's pleasure is, that you keep Cos tard safe and you must let him take no delight, nor no penance; but a' must fast three days a-week: For this damsel, I must keep her at the park; she is allow. ed for the day-woman. Fare you well. Arm. I do betray myself with blushing.-Maid. Arm. I will visit thee at the lodge. Arm. I know where it is situate. Arm. I love thee. Jaq. Fair weather after you! Dull. Come, Jaquenetta, away. [Ex. Dull and Jaq Arm. Villain, thou shalt fast for thy offences, ere thou be pardoned. Cost. Well, sir, I hope, when I do it, I shall do it on a full stomach. Arm. Thou shalt be heavily punished. Cost. I am more bound to you, than your fellows, for they are but lightly rewarded. up. Arm. Take away this villain; shut him Moth. Come, you transgressing slave; away. Cost. Let me not be pent up, sir; I will fast, being loose. Moth. No, sir; that were fast and loose: thou shalt to prison. Cost. Well, if ever I do see the merry days of deso lation that I have seen, some shall see Moth. What shall some see? Cost. Nay, nothing, master Moth, but what they look upon. It is not for prisoners to be too silent in their words; and, therefore, I will say nothing: I thank God, I have as little patience as another man ; and, therefore I can be quiet. [Exeunt Moth and Costard. Arm. I do affect the very ground, which is base, where her shoe, which is baser, guided by her foot, which is basest, doth tread. I shall be forsworn, (which is a great argument of falsehood,) if I love: And how can that be true love, which is falsely attempted? Love is a familiar; love is a devil; there is no evil angel but love. Yet Samson was so tempted; and he had an excellent strength: yet was Solomon so se duced; and he had a very good wit. Cupid's buttshaft is too hard for Hercules' club, and therefore too much odds for a Spaniard's rapier. The first and second cause will not serve my turn; the passado he respects not, the duello he regards not: his disgrace is to be called boy; but his glory is, to subdue men. Adieu, valour! rust, rapier! be still, drum! for your manager is in love; yea, he loveth. Assist me, some extemporal god of rhyme, for, I am sure. I shall turn sonneteer. Devise, wit; write, pen; för I am for whole volumes in folio. [Exit. ACT II. SCENE 1.-Another part of the same. A Pavilion and Tents at a distance. Enter the Princess of France, Rosaline, Maria, Katharine, Boyet, Lords, and other Attendants. Boyet. NOW, madam, summon up your dearest spirits: To whom he sends; and what's his embassy : Of all perfections that a man may owe, Prin. Good lord Boyet, my beauty, though but mean, Tell him, the daughter of the king of France, Boyet. Proud of employment, willingly I go. [Exit. Prin. All pride is willing pride, and yours is so.Who are the votaries, my loving lords, That are vow-fellows with this vir usus duke? power. Prin. Some merry mocking lord, belike; is't so? Mar. They say so most, that most his humours know. Prin. Such short-liv'd wits do wither as they grow. Who are the rest? And much too little of that good I saw, Ros. Another of these students at that time Prin. Fair, I give you back again; and, welcome I have not yet: the roof of this court is too high to be yours; and welcome to the wild fields too base to be nuine. King. You shall be welcome, madam, to my court. Prin. I will be welcome then; conduct me thither. King. Hear me, dear lady; I have sworn an oath. Prin. Our Lady help my lord! he'll be forsworn. King. Not for the world, fair madam, by my will. Prin. Why, will shall break it; will, and nothing else. King. Your ladyship is ignorant what it is. Prin. Were my lord so, his ignorance were wise, Where now his knowledge must prove ignorance. I hear, your grace hath sworn-out hous-keeping: 'Tis deadly sin to keep that oath, my lord, And sin to break it: But pardon me, I am too sudden-hold; To teach a teacher ill beseemeth me. Biron. Did not I dance with you in Brabant once? Kath. The young Dumain, a well accomplish'd To ask the question! youth, Of all that virtue love for virtue lov'd: How needless was it then Biron. Biron. Your wit's too hot, it speeds too fast, 'twill tire. Ros, Not all it leave the rider in the mire. Biron. What time o'day? Ros. The hour that fools should ask. King. Madam, your father here doth intimate A hundred thousand more; in surety of the which, An hundred thousand erowns; and not demands, To have his title live in Aquitain; Prin. You do the king my father too much wrong, Of that which hath so faithfully been paid. Prin. Boyet. So please your grace, the packet is not come, Where that and other specialties are bound; To-morrow you shall have a sight of them. King. It shall suffice me: at which interview, Mean time, receive such welcome at my hand, Prin. Sweet health and fair desires consort your grace! King. Thy own wish wish I thee, in every place! [Exeunt King and his Train. Biron. Lady, I will commend you to my own heart. Ros. 'Pray you, do my commendations; I would be glad to see it. Biron. I would, you heard it groan. Ros. Is the fool sick? Biron. Sick at heart. Ros. Alack, let it blood. Biren. Would that do it good? [Exit Los Boyet. Not unlike, sir; that may be. Biron. What's her name, in the cap? Boyet. Katharine, by good hap. Biron. Is she wedded, or no? Boyet. To her will, sir, or so. Biron. You are welcome, sir; adieu! Boyet. Farewell to me, sir, and welcome to you. [Exit Biron.-Ladies unmask. Mar. That last is Biron, the merry macl-cap lord; Not a word with him but a jest. Boyet. And every jest but a word. Prin. It was well done of you to take him at his word. Boyet. I was as willing to grapple, as he was to board Mar. Two hot sheeps, marry! Boyet. And wherefore not ships? No sheep, sweet lamb, unless we feed on your lips. Mar. You sheep, and I pasture; Shall that finish the jest? Boyet. So you grant pasture for me. Mar. My lips are no common, though Boyet. Belonging to whom? Mar. [Offering to kiss her. Not so, gentle beast; several they be. To my fortunes and me. Prin. Good wits will be jangling: but, gentle, agree: The civil war of wits were much better used On Navarre and his book-men; for here 'tis abused. Boyet. If my observation, (which very seldom lies,) By the heart's still rhetoric, disclosed with eyes, Deceive me not now, Navarre is infected. Prin. With what? Boyet. With that which we lovers entitle, affected. Prin. Your reason? Boyet. Why, all his behaviours did make their retire To the court of his eye, peeping thorough desire: His heart, like an agate, with your print impressed, Proud with his form, in his eye pride expressed: His tongue, all impatient to speak and not see, Did stumble with haste in his eye-sight to be; All senses to that sense did make their repair, To feel only looking on fairest of fair: Methought, all his senses were lock'd in his eye, As jewels in crystal for some prince to buy; Moth. A man, if I live: and this, by, in, and without, Who, tend'ring their own worth, from where they upon the instant: By heart you love her, because your were glass'd, Did point you to buy them, along as you pass'd. An you give him for my sake but one loving kiss. I only have made a mouth of his eye, By adding a tongue which I know will not lie. Res. Thou art an old love-monger, and speak'st skilfully. heart cannot come by her: in heart you love her, be cause your heart is in love with her; and out of heart you love her, being out of heart that you cannot enjoy her. Arm. I am all these three. Moth. And three times as much more, and yet nothing at all. Arm. Feteh hither the swain; he must carry me a letter. Moth. A message well sympathised; a horse to be embassador for an ass! Arm. Ha, ha! what sayest thou? Moth. Marry, sir, you must send the ass upon the Mar. He is Cupid's grandfather, and learns news of horse, for he is very slow-gaited: But I go. Math. Concolinel [Singing. Arm. Sweet air!-Go, tenderness of years; take this key, give enlargement to the swain, bring him festinately hither; I must employ him in a letter to my love. Moth. Master, will you win your love with a French brawl? Arm. How mean'st thou ? brawling in French? Moth. No, my complete master: but to jig off a tune at the tongue's end, canary to it with your feet, humour it with turning up your eye-lids; sigh a note, and sing a note; sometime through the throat, as if you swallowed love with singing love; sometime through the nose, as if you snuffed up love by smelling love; with your hat penthouse-like, o'er the shop of your eyes; with your arms crossed on your thin belly doublet, like a rabbit on a spit; or your hands in your pocket, like a man after the old painting; and keep not too long in one tune, but a snip and away: These are complements, these are humours; these betray nice wenches-that would be betrayed without these; and make them men of note, (do you note, men ?) that most are affected to these. Arm. How hast thou purchased this experience? Moth. By my penny of observation. Arm. But 0,-but 0, Arm. The way is but short; away. Moth, As swift as lead, sir. Arm. Thy meaning, pretty ingenious? Is not lead a metal heavy, dull, and slow? You are too swift, sir, to say so: Is that lead slow which is fir'd from a gun? Arm. Sweet smoke of rhetoric! He reputes me a cannon; and the bullet, that's he :I shoot thee at the swain. Moth. Thump then, and I flee. [Exit. Arm. A most acute juvenal; voluble and free of grace! By thy favour, sweet welkin, I must sigh in thy face: Re-enter Moth and Costard. Math. A wonder, master; here's a Costard broken in a shin. Arm. Some enigma, some riddle: come,-thy l'en voy ;-begin. Cost. No egma, no riddle, no l'envoy; no salve in the mail, sir: O sir, plantain, a plain plantain ; no l'envoy, no l'envoy, no salve, sir, but a plantain! Arm. By virtue, thou enforcest laughter; thy silly thought, my spleen: the heaving of my lungs provokes me to ridiculous smiling: O, pardon me, my stars! Doth the inconsiderate take salve for l'envoy, and the word, l'envoy, for a salve? Moth. Do the wise think them other? is not l'envoy a salve? Arm. No, Page: it is an epilogue or discourse, to make plain Some obscure precedence that hath tofore been sain. The fox, the ape, and the humble-bee, There's the moral: Now the l'envoy. Moth. I will add the l'envoy: Say the moral again. Were still at odds, being but three, Moth. Until the goose came out of door, The fox, the ape, and the humble-bee, Moth. A good l'envoy, ending in the goose; you Cost. The boy hath sold him a bargain; a goose, that's flat: |