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AN INVITATION TO THE ZOOLOGICAL GARDENS. (BY A GENTLEMAN WITH A SLIGHT IMPEDIMENT IN HIS SPEECH.)

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I HAVE found out a gig-gig-gift for my fuf-fuf- fair,
I have found where the rattle-snakes bub-bub-
Won't you c-c-c-come, and I'll show you the hub-bub-
And the lions and tit-tit-tigers at fuf-fuf-fuf-

I know where the c-c-c-co--Cockatoo s song

-breed.
-bear,

-feed.

Makes mum-mum-mum-melody through the sweet vale;
Where the m-monkeys gig-gig- -grin all the day long,
Or gracefully swing by the tit-tit-tit-tit-

-tail.

You shall pip-pip-play, dear, some did-did- -delicate joke, With the bub-bub- -bear on the tit-tit-top of his pip-pippip--pole;

But observe, 'tis for-for-for-bidden to pip-pip-poke

At the bub-bub-bear with your pip-pip-pink pip-pip-pippip-parasol.

You shall see the huge elephant pip-pip-pip-play;

You shall gig-gig-gaze on the stit-tit-ately racoon,

And then did-did- dear together we'll stray,

To the cage of the bub-bubblue fuf-fuf-fac'd bab-bab-bab

You wish'd (I r-r-r-remember it well,

And I 1-1-1-lov'd you the m-m-more for the wish) To witness the bub-bub-bub- -beautiful pip-pip-ican swallow the 1-1-live 1-1-1-little fuf-fuf

Then c-c-come, did-did-dearest, n-n-n-never say nay;”

I'll tit-tit-treat you, my love, to a

-fish.

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nun-nun-nun-nun

66 bub-bub-bub-buss,"

'Tis but thrup-pip pip-pip- pence a pip-pip-piece all the way, To see the hip-pip-pip-(I beg your pardon)

To see the hip-pip-pip-pip-(ahem!)

The hip-pip-pip-pip- pop-pop-pop-pop-(1 mean)

The hip-po-po-po- (dear me, love, you know)

-boon.

The hippo-pot-pot-pot-('pon my word I'm quite ashamed of myself).

The hip pip pop--the hip-po-pot.

To see the Hippop-potamus.

THE CENSUS OF 1851.

THE earnest care of the Government to know the exact number of people that the parish of Clumpley-cum-Bogglesmere contained on an especial night -how many folks slept in 43, Parson's Court, Upper Bloater Street, Chandler's Market, on the same occasion: who populated the police-cells; who put up at hotels; who dozed the night away in cabs and coffee-shops-on billiard-tables and heaps of cabbages-anywhere, everywhere, and nowherethis great investigation of those who cannot believe their Census any longer, is about to come off again, and again to furnish its utterly false returns.

We say utterly false, for the means taken to insure correctness, as to the number of persons who slept in a particular place on a particular night, are contemptibly inefficient. With the smallest foresight, we can furnish a number of tables proving its inaccuracy; and from the mass of evidence taken by the Census Committee of Inquiry after the last return (which evidence has never been made public) we can also bring forward conclusive facts. To show the futility of expecting a correct return from houses we subjoin the following information, taken quite at random, from different individuals.

CASE 1.-Mr. Mark Lane.-I am a single man, and on the Corn Exchange.

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went to bed on the counting-house table, and upset the inkstand into the wafers; and then I went to sleep till the clerk came.

CASE 2-Joseph Badger.-I'm a cabman. I didn't sleep not in no house on that night: I haven't done for years. I took a party from Doory Lane, Julyun's, to

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